✓ Deployed to prod  ///  1,204 tests passing  ///  Lines of code read: 0  ///  Reviewer: also a cat  ///  Merged on a Friday, nothing broke  ///  Do not move the cat  ///  $CATCODE  ///  The keyboard was warm  ///  Bug from 2019: gone  ///  Salary: tuna  ///  It compiled on the first try  /// 
$CATCODE
✓ ~/prod · Build #8812 passed · Author: cat

I sat on the keyboard.
It shipped to prod.

$CATCODE — the coin of the only engineer who has never read a line of code.
~/prod — Super Cat Code
✻ Welcome to Super Cat Code
  /help · meow
  cwd: ~/prod · model: cat · lives: 9
› Tip: you don't write code here. The cat lies on the keyboard and it ships.
>
The cat types, you watch
zzZ
Tap me · I ship
Or press any key
Deploys to prod0/8
Lines read0
Bugs in prod0
RankIntern

It was warm, so I lay down on it. When I got up, 1,204 tests were passing, the bug from 2019 was gone and the deploy was green. The humans have been staring at the screen for three hours and nobody wants to touch anything.

I don't read the code. I don't write the code. I walk across it and it works. Now they pay me in tuna, call me Super Cat Code and ask me to "take a look" at their pull requests. I would like the keyboard back please. It is my bed.

Buy $CATCODE X Follow the cat Chart
CA: soon copy
$ git log --author=cat

Commit history

a1f3c9e · Monday 09:12

Fixed everything

I walked from the a key to the semicolon looking for a warm spot. When I lay down, the bug from 2019 was gone. Three senior engineers had tried for four years. I was looking for a warm spot.

7be04d2 · Monday 13:40

Deleted 4,000 lines

I sat on backspace and fell asleep. When I woke up, the app was twice as fast. The humans called it a refactor. I call it a nap.

c90e11a · Tuesday 03:03

Added 1,204 tests

They appeared while I was chasing the cursor at three in the morning. All of them pass. Nobody knows what they test, including me, and I wrote them.

e55f7b0 · Friday 17:58

Merged to main on a Friday

Humans are not allowed to do this on a Friday. I did it, then went to sleep on the router. Nothing broke. Nothing ever breaks for me.

2d8a6c3 · Saturday 11:20

Renamed all variables to meow

The review came back "looks good to me" in four seconds. I think the reviewer is also a cat. I have not checked. I do not check things.

91c2e4f · Sunday 06:00

Reverted “Move cat off keyboard”

Someone tried to move me. Production went down for eleven minutes. They put me back and it came back up. We don't talk about it.

f00d5cc · Today

Launched $CATCODE

I stepped on a few keys looking for the tuna drawer and a coin went live. The humans asked me how I did it. I licked my paw and looked out the window.

$ cat ~/.catcode/config

Config

Supply1,000,000,000
I counted them by walking across the numpad once. I only walked once, so that is the number. If you want a different number you will have to move me, and we know how that went.
LiquidityUntouched
I do not touch it. I touch keyboards, glasses of water near the edge of the desk and nothing else. That is my whole policy.
Tax0 / 0
I tried to add a tax, but I only know one key and it types meow. The compiler accepted it as zero. I accepted the compiler.
OwnershipNobody
The contract has no owner. I checked by sitting on it for six hours. Nobody came to move me, so nobody owns it.